Before a curious person can discover how someone can get unstuck, I think it’s valuable to first discover how a person gets stuck in the first place. If we’re honest, we have all found at various points in our life that we had become stuck. Stuck in a rut. Stuck in a bad relationship. Stuck in a job we hated but was afraid to leave. Stuck in a financial condition that was less than desirable. We can find ourselves stuck in our negative thinking or in playing victimization roles that lead us to hosting ongoing pity parties that no one wants to attend. No surprise there, right? Interestingly and important to note is that stuck-ness doesn’t just happen overnight. Quite the contrary. Being stuck emotionally, spiritually, relationally, or financially is a sloow process. It’s a journey made up of a thousand small and seemingly insignificant steps. Getting to the Land of Stuck is often a journey by way of a smooth road. Sure, there were a few warning roadblocks along the way, but undeterred we navigated and maneuvered around them and just kept on heading towards Stuck. “There is a way that appears to be right, but in the end it leads to death.” 1 The unsettling part of this life-giving truth is that the way seems to be right. I mean, if something seems right, don’t we naturally, casually (and often carelessly) just keep-on-keepin’-on? That surely has been my story a time or two. Or three. Thank God for maturity that comes from experience.
While serving as chaplaincy director for a female-only substance abuse center, I met a lot of stuck women. Yes, stuck in addiction to alcohol and drugs. Stuck in damaging relationships. Stuck in a fierce physiological battle. Stuck in a street mentality. All of those things seemed impossible to break free from. But in spending time with these women that I came to love, I saw that their biggest needs were for them to get unstuck from their false beliefs and negative core truths. “I’m not enough.” “I’ll never amount to anything.” “I can’t trust anybody.” “My life is a hopeless disaster.” “I’m not meant for anything great.” Most of the women, if not all, adopted these lies when they were but little girls. Girls who at first were filled with childlike hopes and dreams, but in facing continual disappointments began to believe the lie that they were meant to live small.2 Needless to say, these hateful and lying patterns of thought did nothing to awaken them to the potential of a better life or lead them to believe that the God of impossibilities wanted to work a miracle on their behalf. Rather, the lies of their past kept them digging – down, down, down – further into their stuckness.
For many of these women that were entering into rehab, they were finally having the time to breathe, reassess their lives, and hear the good news that they were deeply and passionately loved by their Creator. These perfect storm events inspired many to begin the journey to UNstuck. Oh, the sheer joy of that! As they took one baby step after another, they were at some point confronted by the simple but brutal truth: their biggest enemy was not necessarily Satan, but themselves. Their choices. Their words. Their beliefs. Their ongoing thoughts. Their habits. Their way of coping with sadness. Or anger. Or whatever. It’s said that it’s not knowledge that is power, but rather the application of that knowledge that provides us the power we need to move past our past and our difficulties. Thankfully, many of the women applied the biblical knowledge that they learned about Jesus and as a result they began to personally experience the power of God. The power of deliverance. The power of love. The power of forgiveness. The power of forgiving one’s self.
Someone doesn’t have to have an addiction problem to be ensnared by lies. My friends, we become stuck or unstuck by our thinking because our thoughts and what we believe governs our lives.3 All of us, and I do mean all of us, have patterns of thinking that are either constructive or destructive. While we know that this is true, how much time do we spend in prayer asking God to reveal the hidden land mines of corrupted thoughts? How much time is spent digging around in our garden-heart to discover the poisonous root of a tree that brings forth corrupted fruit – evidenced through our speech and actions? All of us have the potentiality of a renewed life because all of us have the potential for a renewed mind. Renewed minds equal renewed lives.4
How then does one go about getting UNstuck? I believe that first it begins with God. It starts with us asking Him for the eyes to see and the mind to discern where we are stuck currently. Secondly, we must intentionally live FULL. Hopeful. Prayerful. Playful. Joyful. Grateful. There are so many fulls! Simply pick one. Start there. Begin to purposefully reject old worn out negative thinking and speaking patterns – and intentionally replace them with the full that you are working on.
No, it’s not magic.
But it is miraculous.
As a woman crazy for God, I believe that one of my life’s missions is to Inspire Women to Get Unstuck and Live Full. I encourage you today to dare to believe that stuck is not your future – but that living full is! If I can serve you in this journey to FULL, I’d be honored to. Please visit www.LauraDahne.com or hop on over to my Facebook page, Laura Dahne Inner Healing Coach and Author for additional resources of truth and encouragement. For one-on-one coaching or to request availability for me to speak at an upcoming event, please reach out to me. I’m here to serve the King and in doing so, I am here to serve you.
© Excerpts from Getting UNstuck to Live FULL by Laura K. Dahne. Work is protected by copyright law. Article may be shared with intention to encourage and may be reprinted only when using the name of author and book title. J
1 Proverbs 14:12 NIV
2 Proverbs 13:12 CEV “Not getting what you want can break your heart, but a wish that comes true is a life-giving tree.”
3 Mark 6:4-6 BSB Then Jesus told them, “A prophet is without honor only in his hometown, among his relatives, and in his own household.” So He could not perform any miracles there, except to lay His hands on a few of the sick and heal them. And He was amazed at their unbelief.
4 Romans 12:2 ESV “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”